Thursday, November 27, 2008

Yet Another Cinderella Story, penned by: Woo Eileen

This is the "Cinderella Story" I wrote for my English assignment. Hope you'll enjoy?

We all know the story of Cinderella: the one with the glass slipper and happily ever after. But did you know that the story was distorted? No one ever mentioned what happened after Cinderella and the Prince were wedded. This is the uncut version of Cinderella: the true, uncensored story. The one they never let the children hear.

Cinderella’s father was widowed, that was true. He really did marry that stepmother with two daughters too. But the part about his illness, that was wrong. How did he die? He was murdered, of course. In truth his new bride loved his money, and hated him with passion. So she decided to kill him, after the marriage was done. No one ever knew she poisoned him with bits of arsenic powder in his sweets. It took a while for the poison to react, as the effect of arsenic powder in sweets is mild. Months later, he died anyhow. Everyone, even the doctor (except the stepmother), thought it was pneumonia. Well, now we know the truth.

After the funeral, the stepmother set to work. She hired the best lawyers from all over. Cinderella (who was 8 at the time) was heir to her father’s fortune. But the stepmother, greedy to the core, wanted to take every single cent from the poor little thing. As luck would have it, the stepmother won (the case was brought to court). She was the sole trustee of Cinderella’s wealth, meaning she had total power over it. Little Cinderella knew nothing of this, only following when the stepmother took her in. From here, I’m afraid to say, all went downhill for the little girl.

Just as you were told, Cinderella was made to do all the chores in the household. But it was never mentioned that Cinderella was a beggar as well. You see, that foul stepmother, jealous of Cindy’s beauty, grace, and manners, forced her to be a beggar. For she, herself, was never like that, much less her daughters, who were as loud and uncouth as two lumberjacks. Cinderella was never turned out of her home. She was made to beg on the streets, and the money was the stepmother’s to keep. The stepmother and stepsisters, that irksome trio, covered her face with ashes and cinders, so no one would recognize her. Thus, this was how Cinderella lived her life everyday: begging on the streets in the day, doing house chores at night. Of course, she was fed, in small, miserly portions. Her bed was made of straw, in a small corner of the kitchen, with a moth-eaten towel for a blanket. Cinderella wasn’t as meek as she was said to be. Sure enough, though she was forced to be submissive, she was far feistier than she seemed. Many times over, she tried to escape, only to have herself caught by some servant or other, who would rat on her to the stepmother, who would severely beat her till she was black and blue.

Years went by, and Cinderella grew from a child of 8 to a girl of 18. One fine day, there was great excitement; a huge ball was to be held. Invitations were sent to all eligible maidens in the land. Cinderella overheard the news while begging on the streets that day. Rumor had it that the prince would be choosing his bride and queen that day. Cinderella was overjoyed to hear it, for her ticket to escape that evil stepmother was near. She knew very well that her family would be invited, seeing as they were the wealthiest in the land. Indeed, the invitation did come, right into the hands of the stepmother. When the invitation was read, the stepsisters grinned from ear to ear. Both hoped to be chosen to marry the Prince, and live a life of complete luxury. So, the stepsisters began preparations (though the ball was only a week away) to ready themselves for the ball. You wouldn’t believe the lengths they went through! Crash diets, facials, massages, spa treatments, you name it, they’ve done it all! Still, on the night of the ball, it was all for naught. They were just as fat and ugly as ever.

Still, they went in all their glamour and splendor (one insisted to weave gold into her hair, the other wanted pearls in hers) and they were a tad bit overdressed, if you asked me. Right after they left, Cindy went to work – trying to finish altering her mother’s dress into a ball gown. But she was no good in sewing, and ended up wrecking the dress instead. She began to lose hope, when three dwarves in tutus appeared before her eyes.

“Hello, Cinderella! Do not despair! We’re here to help!” said a particularly red-faced dwarf who seemed to grin all the time.

It took Cinderella a great deal of control to stop herself from laughing at the three. “Who are you?” she asked, feigning a laugh as a cough.

“My name is Howdie.” said the red faced one. “This one is Doodie,” he gestured to a very confused-looking dwarf. “And this is Moodie.” He pointed at a very grouchy – looking dwarf. “We are your dwarf – fairies!”

“Dwarf-fairies?” Cinderella said, still trying not to laugh.

“Yes, very distant relatives of dwarves and fairies!”

“Wanna go to the ball?”

“Yes!!” exclaimed Cinderella.

“Be back by 12.” Moodie said grumpily.

With a wave of their wands, Cinderella was at the ball, with a splendid dress, glass slippers, coach and all. Like in the original story, she caught the Prince’s eye and danced with him till 12. Then she fled. Though the Prince tried to hold her back, he was somehow blocked by a jealous maiden (I think it was one of the stepsisters). As she ran, her glass slipper slipped, and the Prince (who somehow managed to get away) picked it up. He declared:

“Whichever maiden fits this slipper shall be my bride!”

Every maiden in the land tried to fit the dainty slipper, harboring great hopes to marry the Prince. Cinderella, who was begging on the streets that day, stood in line to try on the slipper. Her stepfamily were already waiting at the very front. Even the stepmother, who was about 55, wanted to try on the slipper! Needless to say, neither of them could fit it, their feet were far too gigantic! Then came Cinderella’s turn, and everybody jeered. No one believed that the cinder-covered beggar girl could be the ravishing creature who had captured the prince’s heart at the ball. Imagine their shock, when they saw how perfectly the slipper fitted into her foot. Then she drew out the other half, and put it on too. Before anyone knew it, she was whisked off to the palace.

The Prince and Cinderella did marry. That part was true. But there’s more. You see, no one ever mentioned what happened after they got married. All that was said is: “…and they all lived happily ever after!” This is what happened after the wedding. In the bedroom, when the ceremony was over, the Prince told Cinderella this:

“My dear, I must confess, you married not a man, but a woman!”

Please don't say I'm sick, there are worse versions, trust me. For example, a prostitute Cinderella. =)

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Rachael Yamagata

Thanks to Chester and Joyce, I have developed a love for Rachael Yamagata's songs. At first listen, Rachael Yamagata makes you feel tremendously emo. If you were happy, your mood will most likely deteriorate because of her song. But, the more you listen, the more you want more of her songs. That's how I felt anyway. For those of you who have never even HEARD of Rachael Yamagata, her music is NOT J-pop.

I love her voice. I love how emo she sounds when she sings. It's as if she really feels what she's singing. And that's very rare to find nowadays. Her lyrics are inspiring, and her videos are beautiful. But don't just take my word for it, listen to it!

One of her latest songs: Elephants. Beautiful video, beautiful lyrics, beautiful voice. =) And, of course, way better than most MTV videos. I know there are many MTV fans out there but please don't smite me.


Chester dedicated a video to me! Awww... Thanks Ches! Real sweet of you! =D

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

And so.....

Obama Won!

Hence the birth of the first Black president.

And before I forget,


Sayang you!

Hope the nasib malang menceraikan you,
and the nasib baik memperisterikan you. xD
It's starting... The assignments are piling up again. So far, I have about 4 assignments to do. I can't really feel the pressure yet. It only comes when deadlines are near.

Before I forget,

To all BSD-rians:

An apparent psycho has been rumored to be spotted around the vicinity of BSD. Rumor has it that this guy was last seen MASTURBATING in front of 2 girls in front of McDonald's. He is fat, has sepet eyes, and drives a green Kenari. Do take caution.

And a woman was attacked by two males in broad daylight around JALAN SAGA. Ladies, be careful.

With all the robberies and attacks going on around, the streets are no longer considered "safe".


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